Parents should be a coach in life to design

on the child’s future and present the methodology

- Dr. Choi Won-ho, a leader in educating Korean parents

Of late, from adults to youth, incidents and accidents caused by inhuman immoral conduct are disgracing our society. Many people without a chance to learn humanlike behavior are drifting in mammonism and performance-first way of thinking forgetting about a world living together. Dr. Choi Won-ho (adjunct professor at Hanyeong College of Theology) ascribed this problem to the absence of home training. To keep humanlike path of righteousness, he insists on the urgency of education to the parents who are supposed to bring up children.

There is a problem parent behind a dysfunctional family and problem child.

As you sow, shall you reap and a faultless mold makes a good craftwork. Besides, how would it be possible for man as a “personality” to grow up decently in wrong teachings and indifference? In case bullying and school violence occurs, the school and home always passes the buck to each other for which there is no clear solution yet. Regarding this, Dr. Choi Won-ho says, “Every Entrance exam presentation for a “special purpose” high school on the subject of parents is flooded with thousands of them in each tour of major cities. Now, how many would pay a visit in the reality of Korean education if we hold a ? The fact is that nothing pays except studying for college entrance exam.” As he indicates, the school and the home are rearing children entirely aiming toward the college entrance exam entailing the absence of parent-child communication as a side effect. Children are frustrated with the reality which causes them to give up their schoolwork or even the young lives themselves. Here, the problem is the ambivalence of parents who are ready to neglect a poor student but forgive all other faults if only their child is doing well at school. However, the parents should act as a coach who must initiate in showing a beautiful life and teach a humanlike way of life to their child. They willingly look the other way for the immediate purpose of entrance exam even when they know what to do with the children. Applying only the rod to children these days, who are usually hungry for love and humane treatment, will only lead them astray with jaundiced view of life. When passing through the high school days, children get out of the jurisdiction of their parents. Thus, it is only effective to provide the children with a solution by developmental stage from kindergarten to elementary school and before the graduation of middle school, which constitutes the most critical period for developing nature.

Effects on the children of imposing them without showing a parent’s own model

One of the biggest worries among parents these days is “Though knowing the importance of character education, I still don’t know how to deal with my child.” Dr. Choi has been constantly presenting the right direction with books and lectures for educating parents. First, he says that parents must have children form their own character by age and, if it is delayed, straighten things before it is too late. Attendees of his lecture are various groups from preliminary parents in their prenatal care to middle-aged ones of middle and high school children who most tend to be at loggerheads with parents. To give these parents customized training service, he is increasing the educational effect on learners through group lectures and brainstorming rather than one-to-one service. Parents are the sailor holding the key of a ship of the child and a coach who must nurture an athlete. They are uniquely responsible to design an accurate strategy. Such parents with a sense of duty can gather together in mutual sympathy about many instances and give thoughts to the common problems to change the viewpoint on the child. Such a team teaching is more helpful than an ordinary way of delivering knowledge. Dr. Choi indicates that the parents are already on the level of theoretical specialist in child education by head except failing to carry what they are familiar with into practice. So it is the best way to put what parents think into action to change the future of child positively. Besides, parent’s inferiority complex out from physical, mental and material comparison makes a tremendous effect on the child. Working it positively motives the child toward success. Conversely, working it negatively keeps the child even from smooth human relations because of a sense of shame and loss of confidence. It is the case that the parent’s desire to have his social complex compensated through the child’s success in life spoil not only his but also the child’s life. Thus, it is dangerous for one to try designing on the child’s life without overcoming this on his part.

Parent’s proper character education can straighten the public education and moral views of the society.

Only a peaceful home can make a child stable. Only the parent’s happiness can make the child happy. In his book published in 2010, Dr. Choi proposes that many people unfold their complex they are wrapped up with rather broadly. As Roosevelt declared in his wise saying, “No inferiority complex can be allowed to exist within me without my permission.” Besides, a person’s complex can be a stepping stone for future success if it is overcome instead of hidden. Looking at parents who lead a true life without affectation, a child naturally takes them as a role model in his life. Also, there is an objective that parents should absolutely reach in cooperation with the society and the school. It is to reduce driving a preschooler or children in elementary school out to the market of private education. Dr. Choi says that it is not late for a student to start preparation for college entrance while attending middle school. Too late character education is like binding up a full-grown pine tree forcibly with wires for the reason of growing it in a pot. His book published in 2013 further emphasizes that the biggest property a parent can pass down to a child is “character” rather than material. Happiness is not determined by school record, college or occupation. What matters more is to become a personality who can put up with what he is not pleased and give vent to a voice of conscience in behalf of justice. It is the way that he can lead a happy life by knowing and practicing what he wants as a human. If you feel the process of designing on the healthy character of a child is difficult or fearful, let’s set about by following the illustrated sentences in each chapter of the book. It has summed up everything comprehensively from delivering words carefully in control of feelings to relieving the conflict and how to give corporal punishment without damaging the child’s character. So far, there have been many lectures that hurt the feelings of parents by picking faults of their ignorance and indifference at random. Through Dr. Choi’s method of informing how to nurture the child’s character in the right way combined with conjugal and domestic happiness, they will experience a true ‘healing as a parent.’